Buying a special Christmas present doesn't have to be a difficult ordeal. Keep these seven secrets in mind and your gift will leave her in awe.

Are you looking for a special Christmas gift to give your wife or significant other?

There is the old adage when it comes to gift-giving, "It's the thought that counts." While this is generally true, finding the perfect gift for your loved one can be a challenge.

You want to find a gift that will impress her, but also show you pay attention to what matters. It's a bit different than the sort of gift-giving between friends.

"If it is friend to friend, people will remain thoughtful," says Devin A. Byrd, Ph.D., associate professor and chair of the Department of Behavioral Sciences at South University-Savannah. "If it is a romantic relationship, people will try to go for sentiment as well. [Gift-giving] taps into how we want to connect with that individual."

How can you connect with your loved one in a unique way through your gift?

Read on to learn 7 secrets for buying the perfect sentimental and romantic Christmas gift for her.

1. Reflect on Your Relationship Together

A great way to find Christmas gifts is to reflect on your relationship together.

Depending on how long you have been together, you have experienced many different things. This can include life events, fun activities and unique adventures you have made your own.

Is there a memorable trip you have taken together? Are there particular experiences or a moment in time that stick out to you?

By reflecting on your relationship, this can help you decide on a gift that helps connect her to those wonderful memories you've made together.

2. Listen to What She Says

Sometimes finding Christmas gifts is simply a matter of listening to what she says when you are around her.

When you have gone out together to a restaurant, is there a particular recipe or type of food that is her favourite?

If there is a food that she's especially fond of, try doing some research on a good recipe for making it. The act of making her favourite meals on a monthly basis in the coming new year is a Christmas gift that can be unexpected and very romantic. Gift-wrap a little book with pictures of all the meals you plan to make for her, and put it under the tree.

As you spend your days together, listen to the comments she makes. By doing this, you can pick up on her preferences, even if she doesn't intend to drop those sort of hints.

3. Watch Her Shop

Watching her shop can be a great way to pick up on ideas for Christmas gifts.

Are there particular brands or product lines she prefers over others? What about a certain kind of stone or colour?

Take a mental note of the things she likes but also remember the things she doesn't like. By keeping track of this, you can create a short list of potential gifts to give her, whether it's an occasion like Valentine's Day or another special event.

4. Learn About Her Family

When you know a lot about her family, this can be a great way to buy Christmas gifts for your loved one.

What are some of the meaningful moments she's had with her family? Are there any particular places they've spent time together that hold a special place in her heart?

By knowing about these meaningful places and moments, you can buy gifts that harken back to those important times in her life. Besides being a loving gesture by you towards her, it also shows her family that you care a lot about them too.

5. Incorporate a Gift Into Future Plans

Is there a holiday you have wanted to take together for a while? Is there a restaurant or other place that's a special one for you both?

Another secret to finding Christmas gifts is to incorporate your gift into future plans together.

If you have the budget for it, consider planning a short holiday together to that destination. This is something exciting for you both to look forward to together. It also gives you the chance to continue making memories in your relationship through unique experiences.

6. Capture the Moment

Christmas gifts can also help to capture the moment of a particular event taking place in her life.

Has she taken a position with a new company or received a promotion? You could consider buying her an item that's unique to that new company. This may be a particular book to learn more about the industry she will be working in.

If she's been promoted, you may consider buying her a new piece of fine jewellery to commemorate this special achievement in her life.

By giving her a gift that relates to an important moment or event, there's a better chance that down the road, she will identify the item with that positive time in her life.

7. Talk to Her Best Friend

If you are having trouble finding a Christmas gift for her, consider talking to her best friend about it in confidence. Her best friend is someone that knows her well and may have known her for far longer than you have.

They can help you brainstorm unique ways to surprise your loved one. This can also help give you insight into items or experiences that will mean more to her than others.

You might even be able to come up with a Christmas gift that includes her best friend or others who are close to her. This can also be a great way to show her friends that you appreciate them being a part of her life -- something meaningful to her and those closest to her.

Wrapping Up: Buying a Christmas Gift for Her

To give an ideal Christmas gift, you have to reflect on your relationship together and what means the most to her.

It's not enough to find an expensive item and impress her with the cost of it. You need to take an honest look at who she is and what she is passionate about.

By taking the time to consider this before you begin shopping, you will be able to narrow down a list of truly sentimental Christmas gifts for her. This way you can give her the perfect gift that shows you put some real thought into before making your decision.

I would love to hear your comments or answer any questions you might have about this post.

Yours sincerely,   

Dr. Carissa Coulston, Clinical Psychologist

BSc(Hons), MPsychol(Clinical), PhD, MAPS